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Puzzled, one student raised his hand and asked, "What gender is a computer? You know how to say, "I can't go swimming -- I've eaten less than 2 hours ago." in 5 languages. SNOBOL If you succeed, shoot yourself in the left foot. Unix % ls foot.c foot.h foot.o toe.c toe.o % rm * .o rm: .o: No such file or directory % ls Visual Basic You'll shoot yourself in the foot, but you'll have so much fun doing it that you won't care.

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The lightning zapped my previous data, lost and gone forevermore. " To this day I do not know The place to which lost data goes.

To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. They set themselves before their computers and begin. After a while, smoke billows out of disk drives and monitors. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. Now all my data's gone and I long for yesterday-ay-ay-ay.

Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Windows Virus Scan 1.0 - "Windows found: Remove it? Your hard drive has been scanned and all stolen software titles have been deleted. They type furiously for several hours, lines of code streaming up the screen. " God chuckles, "Jesus saves." 25 interesting things you learn about computers in the movies....... You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer as the characters come across the screen. All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just underneath the surface. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second. When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control panels will explode, as will the entire building. If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen. Yesterday, The need for back-ups seemed so far away. Guru Mac Kenzie Typing the lines of a program that no one will run; Isn't it fun? Eleanor Rigby Crashes the system and loses 6 hours of work; Feels like a jerk. ==================================== Unix Man -------- He's a real UNIX Man Sitting in his UNIX LAN Making all his UNIX plans For nobody.

I pleaded with the cursed machine: I begged and cried and then I swore. He had arranged to meet the man just after dinner time, so the two hopped into the car and drove to the ice cream store. Once time became the problem -- not the vanilla ice cream -- the engineer quickly came up with the answer: vapor lock.

Then I tried in desperation, several random combinations, Still there came the incantation, just as senseless as before. It was vanilla ice cream that night and, sure enough, after they came back to the car, it wouldn't start. It was happening every night, but the extra time taken to get the other flavors allowed the engine to cool down sufficiently to start. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to control any temperature rise that may be the result of an exothermic reaction. Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. **Contributed to Swenny's E-Mail Funnies by Clint Fast, Fargo, North Dakota** 1. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you backward. People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data. A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries. There are no ways to copy a backup file-and there are no undelete utilities. If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you try to access it. No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any system you put it into. I knew my data was all here to stay, Now I believe in yesterday. Look at him working, Munching some chips as he waits for the code to compile; It takes a while... Guru Mac Kenzie Wiping the crumbs off the keys as he types in the code; Nothing will load. Knows the blocksize from du(1) Cares not where /dev/null goes to Isn't he a bit like you And me? ========================== Something --------- Something in the way it fails, Defies the algorithm's logic! I don't want to leave it now I'll fix this problem somehow Somewhere in the memory I know, A pointer's got to be corrupted. I don't want to leave it now I'm too close to leave it now You're asking me can this code go?



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But what I found weird was not the harmless duplicity, but the fact that guys wanted to date simply because I was an English-speaking foreigner.… continue reading »


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He also played for England 36 times, scoring one goal against Iceland in 2004.… continue reading »


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Vous pouvez cliquer sur l'image pour l'agrandir : le chargement est un peu long car l'image est en haute définition. 19 compagnons d'infortune, naufragés en pleine mer. … continue reading »


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